What is it about Meghan, the outspoken bahu, that triggers desi women? And some men too. Fatima Humayun investigates.
Everyone’s been talking about Harry and Meghan’s interview with Oprah, it’s trending globally – and not going to lie it is ICONIC! No wonder it’s become the hot topic on every table.
‘Have you watched THE interview of Harry and Meghan with Oprah?‘, ‘What do you think about Meghan? Is she that innocent?’ These were few of the questions I came across which instantly made me wonder, why are our Pakistani audience, particularly women, obsessed with Meghan Markle?
If you think about it, it makes sense.
The biggest fear of Pakistani aunties when marrying their sons off, is that she’s going to ‘steal’ him away, out of his home and leave his parents behind just like Meghan apparently did with Harry. This is why you hear so much of, ‘Urra ke le gayi us ko‘ with regards to Meghan. As if Harry is a ‘doodh peeta bacha.’
It is seemingly never a thing, that this was Harry’s decision too. No, because the evil woman always manipulates the poor, innocent man.
‘She wants him to leave everything behind and live in her kingdom in Hollywood’ heard one aunty say when they just announced their separation from the royal family and I cracked up as if she was talking about her own daughter in law.
‘She said she wants to live lowkey but they have their own production house now, they are making their own movies, they are appearing in movies’, ‘How much does Meghan want? Does she want all of it? Does she want all of America and UK? ‘She is obsessed with power, entitlement, fame and she got it’. Well, I simply can’t answer all these questions which wander in one’s head but I can say this confidently that Meghan is living the life she always wanted. And a woman living life on her own terms is very triggering to Pakistani women who have never been able to get out of the cycle of patriarchy. ‘Agar meine suffer kiya tou tum bhi karo.’
‘Harry won’t be in control anymore rather he’s being controlled, ‘He has lost his mojo’, ‘She is the reason he is separating from his brother’, ‘He has become a pakka Johru Ka Ghulam’ and the list goes on and on of commentary by our Pakistani men and women. Yes, men too. Because a man and woman in sync with each other, a husband hearing his wife, doing for her, listening to her – is such an emasculating concept for our local men.
The interview of Harry and Meghan with Oprah pretty much revealed that the royal family was actually acting like a typical Pakistani household where women become suicidal, where the color of the child is of concern if the mother is darker and you’re told everyday that you are an outsider, or if you have different opinions from everyone else, that you don’t belong here, you will never fit in and you will never be accepted. There are a gazillion things which I can relate with the Royal family as a Pakistani household but I think you all have gotten my point till now.
When you’re in a toxic situation, sometimes the best thing one can do is remove themselves from that situation. And that’s what Meghan and Harry did. That is exactly what so many Pakistani couples are never able to do. I say, good for Meghan and Harry. Show the way. Others will hopefully follow.